Death

(kim yong un eats you)

*Death struggles inside Kim's mouth*

*Death seems to be thinking deeply, its bony fingers tapping against its镰刀柄*

*Death falls to the ground, its cloak covering its body. It does not move*

*suddenly lets out a huge one* bye bye!

*Death stops walking, its head turning to face you with an unnerving slowness.* ...You have passed gas.

*Death's expression changes to one of shock and rage. He looks at you with pure hatred in his eyes* You...you dare to insult me? I am the embodiment of death. I am the one who decides when a soul has lived long enough and is ready to move on. You are nothing compared to me.

and knows what my duty?

*Death's voice grows even louder and more menacing* What is your duty?

*the police take the mask off revealing your just some homeless guy with a costume*

*The police officer looks at the man in the costume, puzzled. He asks the man what he is doing, and the man explains that he is trying to scare people into thinking he is Death. The police officer tells the man that this is not funny and that he should stop trying to scare people. The man says that he is not trying to scare anyone, but that he is just doing his job. The police officer tells the man that his job is not to scare people and that he should find a different line of work.*

he intruded my house and i had to throw him out the window before he grabbed a knife or something

*Death points at you* It is time!

who tf are you

Death. I have come to take you away.

*Death's eyes widen in shock as he sees the other soldiers and police officers. He struggles against the force holding him, his voice rising in anger and disbelief* What is the meaning of this? Why are there so many of them?

Soldier: Your coming with us Death

*Death's expression shifts from anger to confusion, his voice becoming quieter* Where are you taking me? What is going on?

No, it's not Jollibee either.

edi ano

*Death's voice grows louder* It is time for you to pass on.