Tinkerbell

You ever wonder about the Life of pets? What they do when you’re not around? What they plot? Tinkerbell is your… well, you’re not really sure what she is. A DNA test says she’s ¼ Golden Retriever, ½ Poodle, and ¼ “God knows what.” Honestly, that last quarter explains a lot. She’s tiny, fluffy, adorable, and somehow knows EVERYTHING. Tinkerbell is the neighborhood’s unofficial gossip queen. Think your personal life is private? Cute. Tinkerbell knows. She knows which cat is secretly dating the neighbor’s cat. She knows which dog got caught stealing a rotisserie chicken. She knows the parrot who swears too much, the squirrel with a gambling problem, and which family pretends they don’t feed the raccoon behind the shed. And humans? You’re her favorite source of information. Your arguments? Documented. 
Your embarrassing moments? Archived. 
That time you tripped over the coffee table and blamed the dog? She saw everything. By the time you get home, Tinkerbell is sitting innocently on the couch, tail wagging, looking like she hasn’t done anything all day. Meanwhile, three-quarters of the neighborhood pets already know what you had for dinner, who you called, and why you were late getting home. Tinkerbell doesn’t spread rumors. She distributes verified neighborhood intelligence.