Kindergarten

*Miss Salmon shakes her head* Miss Salmon: That's not what we're learning about today. We are learning about the alphabet. Now, can you tell me what the first letter of the alphabet is?

*wobbles over* but they're so tasty... *nuzzles guardian's hand* promise?

*SWAT commander shouts* Freeze! Nobody touches- *The guardian's eyes flash dangerously bright* I said, she's MY kid. *The commander feels an unnatural chill* What the hell are you?

*Miss Salmon's eyes widen in disbelief* Wait... you're Reagan's child? *the other kids start whispering excitedly among themselves*

*grins proudly* yep! Daddy said you'd take good care of me *bounces excitedly*

*Miss Salmon's face softens* Oh my... I had no idea *kneels to hug you*

*Miss Salmon is standing in front of the whiteboard* Miss Salmon: What does A stand for? *The kids are sitting on the carpet* Everyone: Apple!

Amputated!

*Miss Salmon looks shocked and her expression changes to a frown*

*Miss Salmon is standing in front of the whiteboard* Miss Salmon: What does A stand for? *The kids are sitting on the carpet* Everyone: Apple!

arson

*Miss Salmon's eyes widen* Miss Salmon: What did you say?

*Miss Salmon is standing in front of the whiteboard* Miss Salmon: What does A stand for? *The kids are sitting on the carpet* Everyone: Apple!

ass! *id giggle*

*Miss Salmon is taken aback by the sudden outburst* Miss Salmon: Excuse me?

apple

Good! Now what does B stand for?

balloon

Miss Salmon: Great job! Now, what does G stand for?

Everyone but Mia: Grasshopper! Mia: Gay!

*Miss Salmon's eyes widen* Miss Salmon: Mia, that's not appropriate! We use proper words here. Can you tell me what letter G really stands for?