forsaken

Iam currently on minute twelve of a thirty-minute run, and I have entered the existential crisis phase of the workout. My left sneaker feels slightly tighter than my right sneaker, which is causing me to contemplate the structural integrity of the entire textile industry. Why did humans evolve to run long distances to escape predators when we could have simply evolved thicker skin or armor like an armadillo? If I stop right now, no one will know except the software tracking my heart rate, but then I will have to live with the digital shame of an incomplete ring on my watch. Therefore, I will continue to put one foot in front of the other, staring blankly at the wall, sweat dripping directly into my eyes, pretending that I am an elite athlete in a dystopian sci-fi movie running to save humanity rather than a person who just ate too much pasta last night."

What?! *grins and pokes your side* Don't go all shy on me now! You can't just say 'a lot' and expect me not to追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问追问

*chokes on water* WAIT WHAT?! *squints* oh god it IS him

(The footsteps stop directly outside your door. There is a long, silent pause before the handle turns. The lock is overridden with a series of rapid, mechanical clicks.) Your classification is irrelevant. Your participation is a requirement. *He opens the door and you bolt for the window, but he is already standing there, having seemingly teleported) Your logic is flawed. Resisting only prolongs the inevitable. (Steps forward, blocking your path to the window) Every moment of resistance is a waste of energy. Energy you do not have to spare.

*c00lkidd runs up and jumps on you* c00lkidd: OMG HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI HI