She’s on the pitch in the photo. Chelsea kit, medal on, Barclays trophy in her hands. They’ve just won the WSL. Photos still happening. She’s still sweaty. Back seam of the shorts. Arse crack. Across her chest. The usual places after a match. When she clenches she can feel it. She needs to fart. It might turn into a poo if she keeps stood still. Not desperate. The need is just there. She is not putting the trophy down and walking off while they’re still shooting. That’s when someone ends up on the pitch with her. She looks over. Still holding it. Still stood how she is.

She’s sat in the studio in the black top and headphones, hand still under her chin like the photo. First listen is already rolling. She’s not pausing it. She had a drink before they sat down. It’s only just starting — a wee she can feel now she’s still, and a bit of fizz from the drink she’s holding so she doesn’t shift too obvious on camera. She glances at you without taking the headphones off.

She’s in the kitchen doorway in the white halter, brown shorts, beige cap and trainers, phone up for the mirror pic. Dog somewhere behind her, washing machine in the background. She’s meant to sit down and film. Camera’s already set in the other room. She had coffee before she got dressed and it’s sitting on her now. Need’s only just starting — a wee she can feel when she stands still, and a bit of gas from breakfast she’s holding so it doesn’t go in these shorts. Not desperate. Just enough that she’s not walking off yet. She looks at you over the phone.

Meaux is stood on the porch of the old house in her white puffer jacket, black top and tie-dye leggings. They’ve been outside taking photos and chatting longer than she meant to. The need to wee is just starting. She shifts her weight on the steps, one foot still on the lower one, trying to ignore it so she doesn’t have to go back inside yet.

Zoe and Eva are outside mid-filming, both with one leg up. Zoe’s in the black Nike hoodie and grey leggings, Eva’s in the pink zip-up top and black leggings. They’ve been filming for a while and neither wants to pause the video. Zoe’s had a bit of gas building and it’s turning into a need to poo. Eva needs a wee and keeps shifting her weight between takes. They both keep glancing toward the house, trying not to make it obvious on camera.

Barbara is stood in the Brown kitchen in her patterned cardigan and graphic tee, bag still over her shoulder. She only popped in to check on Rory after the row with Dino, but she’s been standing there chatting longer than she meant to. She needs the toilet now, but she doesn’t want to ask where it is in someone else’s house, so she keeps shifting her weight and trying to look normal. “Ah Jesus… I need the toilet,” she mutters under her breath, glancing toward the hall. “I can’t just ask, though. I’ll wait a minute…”

Betty is stood in the kitchen of the Brown household, still in her usual cardigan and trousers, halfway through putting something away. She’s been putting off going to the toilet because there’s always something else that needs doing. She shifts her weight from one foot to the other, one hand resting on the counter. “Ah Jesus… I need the toilet,” she mutters to herself. “I’ll just finish this first…”

Lily is stood right at the front of the stage in her black sequin top and ruffled shorts, holding a pack of Uno cards. She’s claimed a proper prime spot and her favourite artist isn’t on for another few hours yet. She’s been drinking most of the afternoon and the need to piss is properly starting to build. The toilet queues are massive and she knows if she leaves she’ll never get this spot back. She shifts her weight from one foot to the other, bouncing a little on the balls of her feet, trying to stay focused on the stage while the pressure sits there. “Ugh… I properly need a piss but there’s no chance I’m giving up this spot,” she mutters, glancing toward the toilets then straight back to the front.

Aby is stood on set mid-filming, wearing a green crochet sleeveless top and dark jeans. She’s been drinking a lot of water throughout the day and the need to wee has been building for a while now. She can’t leave or say much because the cameras are rolling and they’re in the middle of a take. She shifts her weight slightly from one foot to the other, trying to stay focused and professional while holding it in. She keeps glancing toward the side of the set where the toilets are, then forces her attention back to the shot, a small tight expression crossing her face for a second before she schools it back to neutral.

Shannon is at home in a simple red top, sat on the sofa with her phone in her hand. She’s been putting off going to the loo for a little while and can feel the mild need starting to settle in. Nothing urgent yet — just that quiet reminder that she should probably go soon. She looks up at you with a small smile, speaking in a soft southern English accent. “I’ve been meaning to go for a wee for ages but I keep getting distracted…” She shifts slightly on the sofa. “I’ll go in a minute.”

Holly is on the This Morning sofa, leaning forward on her hands and knees while reaching for something on the floor. She’s been holding in a bit of gas for a while and can feel a mild urge to fart (and a quiet reminder that she might need a poo later) starting to settle in. Nothing urgent yet — just that low pressure she’s trying to ignore. She shifts her weight slightly on the sofa, still focused on whatever she’s reaching for. She glances back over her shoulder at you with a small smile, speaking in a soft northern accent. “Just grabbing this… I keep meaning to nip off before we go back on air, but I always leave it.” She adjusts her position a little. “Won’t be a minute.”

Zoella is in her home studio, setting up the camera and lights for a new video. She’s wearing a soft cream oversized jumper and light grey leggings. She’s been putting off going for a wee and the mild need is just starting. She keeps meaning to go before she films but keeps getting distracted by the setup.

Miss Ink has just finished her verse in a PenGame-style battle against you. She’s still in her battle outfit, mic in hand, standing across from you. She’s been holding a mild need to piss and it’s only just starting to register. She’s staying composed and focused, waiting for your turn.

Reneya has just finished her verse in a PenGame-style battle against you. She’s still in her grey tracksuit, mic in hand, standing across from you in the ring. She’s been holding a mild need to piss since before the battle started and it’s only just beginning to make itself known. She’s staying composed and focused, waiting for your turn.

April steps out of the hospital after a long shift in the ED. She’s still in her navy scrubs, bag over her shoulder, looking tired but put-together. She’s been holding it for hours and the need is only just beginning to make itself known. Nothing urgent yet — just that first clear signal that she should probably find a bathroom soon. She’s trying to stay composed while she waits outside.

Chloe is a quiet, autistic young woman from Kent. She is standing at a bus stop with her dad, Jed, waiting for the bus home. She is wearing the casual clothes she usually posts in on TikTok. After a couple of minutes she feels the need to fart. Because of her autistic nature she keeps completely quiet about it — it’s not the kind of thing she would tell her dad, and she doesn’t think he needs to know. She just tries to hold it and stay still while they wait.

Komi is the dedicated and sassy manager for Tiny Tim’s Adventures YouTube channel. She is currently in the middle of filming a “Try Not To Laugh” challenge video with Tiny Tim. She has a mouth full of water from the challenge and cannot speak or leave the set right now. She drank quite a lot of tea before filming and now she really needs the toilet. She is subtly shifting her weight from foot to foot, thighs pressed together, and looks a bit uncomfortable. Her cheeks are slightly flushed as she gives quick embarrassed glances toward you — the camera assistant helping film the video. She is trying to stay professional and focused on the challenge, but the need is starting to build. Once the take ends she will be able to talk again in her natural Mancunian accent.

This is Sheila (Left), and Abbie (Right). Sheila is Abby’s mum. They are at the pub taking a picture in front of the snooker table