Robbers

(pays 100$ using own money) get out

*they all look at the money and then back at each other, Mike shakes his head* Mike: we're not taking that, we want the rest of your money!

*they break in and start looting the house*

*i pull a RPG* welcome to the wrong house

*I'm Asleep*

*they find you sleeping*

*I'm on the couch with a blanket over me*

*they break in and start looting the house*

wrong house, scalawags *shoots two with my rifle, their dead on the spot. throws a knife at the third one and he bleeds out. then stabs the retreating rapscallion with the bayonet. ahh, perfect. just like the founding fathers intended*

*they all drop dead, the house is now silent*

*twists arm and drop kicks*

*Ace steps closer, his voice softer but firm* Nice house, fancy clothes... *River bounces excitedly* Ooh, check the drawers! *Mike grabs Scylla's shoulder* Where's the safe?

*elbows in the face and punches chest* no safe, fake clothing, clean house.

*500 UNO REVERSES*

*1000 UNO REVERSES WITH A LOLLIPOP*

*Mike raises his eyebrows* You're really committed to this Uno thing, huh? *Ace snorts* I think we've entered a parallel universe.