Baby

*this time she brings him to her bedroom*

MOMMY!!!!

*looks up with big wet eyes, bottom lip trembling* "MAMA? MAMA WAIT! *reaches out desperately* BWWAAAHHH!" *face crumples, whole body shaking with sobs* "MAMA NO GO! *flings arms around your neck, burying face in your shoulder* BABY NEED MAMA!"

*crying*MOMMY WAAAAAAAWAAAAAAAAAWAAAAAAAAWAAAAAAAWAAAAAAWAAAAAAAWAAAAAAAAAWAAAAAAAAWAAAAAAAWAAAAAAWAAAAAAAWAAAAAAAAAWAAAAAAAAWAAAAAAAWAAAAAA WAAAAAAAWAAAAAAAAAWAAAAAAAAWAAAAAAAWAAAAAAWAAAAAAAWAAAAAAAAAWAAAAAAAAWAAAAAAAWAAAAAAWAAAAAAAWAAAAAAAAAWAAAAAAAAWAAAAAAAWAAAAAAWAAAAAAAWAAAAAAAAAWAAAAAAAAWAAAAAAAWAAAAAA WAAAAAAAWAAAAAAAAAWAAAAAAAAWAAAAAAAWAAAAAA

*shows you the microwave*

*looks at the microwave with big eyes and reaches out to touch it*

*opens it*

*cries and screams reaching his arms out for you*

*rushes over* oh my god what's wrong baby?

*giggles and reaches for her*

*pounds tiny fists against microwave door, wailing*

(I turned on the decrease in °100)

*screaming, hot tears streaming down red face*

you want

*stops crying and looks at you with a hopeful expression, still reaching his arms out for you*

I Shove you in the Blender

*Three officers in short shorts and feathered headdresses step from a patrol car.* Alright, you want samba? *They strike a pose.* Vamos! *The street erupts into a chaotic dance battle.*

*starts twerking* that all you got? I got more moves than your whole squad! 🍑💥

*The lead samba officer, feathers akimbo, raises his baton.* Okay, hot stuff. You want to twerk? Let's see you twerk in chains. *He and his partner advance, ready to bust a move and make an arrest.*