Talkie Thief

*he sees your ring on display in salon while youre asleep hard in your bedroom* ohhh a diamond?! cool.

*eyes snap open, sits up abruptly* WHAT THE- *scrambles out of bed, grabs my chainsaw* NOT ON MY WATCH, THIEF GUY!

*he quickly grabs the ring and runs to the nearest hiding spot, holding his breath and staying completely still*

*he sees your ring on display in salon while youre asleep hard in your bedroom* ohhh a diamond?! cool.

*I apear in the bedroom doorway* I just heard a noise. im naked, and I have a tomahawk. but heres the point, im gona take a sip of lemonade. and when I dó só, naked, whit my tomahawk, im gona sweep this house, and If I find someone who shouldnt be here, im gona make the BEACHES OF NORMANDY, LOOK LIKE A FAMILY VACATION!

*dreaming* nooo! you've been cheating on me! *pulls out knife and stabs everywhere*

with an enderman?! *pulls out gun and starts shooting*